Big Fish Games

Saturday, July 12, 2014

The narcissistic, the Asperger's teen, and bipolar me.

Stretch is now 15, with Asperger's and bipolar like his momma. The hubs is a narcissistic man. If we aren't the trio from the world of difficult, I don't know what is. Stretch has been on this Ebay kick wanting to sell all of his stuff (mostly broken) and I keep trying to tell him that it's not that simple, but oh no, he knows better than me. When I put my foot down and tell him to stop because he doesn't understand how it works, and nobody is going to buy broken stuff, he gets mad at me like I just killed a puppy or something. Hubs doesn't know about the Ebay kick Stretch is on. There are just some things that it's better that he doesn't know.

I have learned that when dealing with hubs, I have to get the kid gloves out along with the candy coating. The best way that I've learned to deal with him is to make him think he's in control and everything is his idea. That's the best I can do for now. My therapist is helping me with ideas to help too.

My mom is another worry of mine. A couple of  weeks ago she kept getting dizzy and falling and hitting her head. Then last week she had a seizure (grand mal) because she forgot to take her meds for a few days, so her Dilantin levels were 0. This time my brother was there to see how bad she is. I've been trying to tell him for over a year and I don't know if he didn't believe me or what, but he never took me seriously. Now that he's seen her for himself, he is concerned. I don't think my mom has a whole lot of time left, and because of her health, there is no company that will insure her for life insurance. Yesterday though, I was telling my therapist about all of this and she had a genius idea. She said to get a hold of a crematorium or funeral home after speaking to my brother about it, and start making payments on cremation now, that way when she does pass it won't be such a financial burden for me since I am the eldest of her children and the next of kin. Great idea! Morbid to think about and do, but I can't get life insurance on her, so that is the only option I have.

Saturday, July 5, 2014

Some articles I found helpful for dealing with a narcissist.

In my previous couple of posts, I have been talking about the hubs being a narcissist and how to deal with him, because I do love him and our family together, so for me, giving up is not an option. I am actually very surprised at the volume of articles and documents that I have waded through that have said to just leave. To me that is the cowards way out and not a solution at all, UNLESS there is abuse present in the relationship, then by all means, yes, run as fast as you can. Here are 3 sites that gave some positive coping and resolution suggestions, 2 of the sources surprised me, and I think they will surprise you too.

1. http://www.idiotsguides.com/static/quickguides/selfhelp/coping-with-a-narcissistic-partner-or-spouse.html

2. http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-a-Narcissistic-Husband

3. http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/12/27/how-to-live-with-a-narcissist/

These were the first 3 that I found helpful. I will keep looking and researching though because just 3 sites for suggestions don't cut it for me.